Time Trials – October 2015

The world is currently gripped in rugby world cup fever, this has meant much shouting at an unresponsive television and a few too many glasses of wine. Now England is out it all seems a bit silly.

So to compensate for this Henley rowing club masters have been training hard for the Phyllis court time trials. These happen every year on our stretch of the river and it is a chance for us to show off again. Two masters crews entered (we feel very strongly that it is important for other people to have a go at winning some prizes) and then the crew and groupies not competing were instructed to be on the bank waving flags.

It is a very short course (from Upper Thames to Phyllis Court) and as such requires minimum effort to complete. We are no novices to this race, we have completed it many times, usually getting to the finish in one piece. Indeed, it is rumored that two members of the crew once had a ‘domestic’ in a boat as to where the finish line was, which became the local gossip of Phyllis court for months to follow.

The usual cox had been replaced by another more attractive model for this race (we do take appearances very seriously) and so was able to act as photographer for the morning. This is a task that was undertaken seriously, and as such she and a couple of others started the day at Patisserie Valerie in the market place to ensure that they were well prepared for the rigors of the day ahead. Incidentally, Patisserie Valerie do a superb breakfast. It was perhaps unfortunate that Henley half marathon was also on the same day, this meant that once we were on position on the tow path these slightly sweaty people kept running past, blocking the view to the river. We cheered on the first few (these were the race leaders) and then after a while got bored and so were left commenting on how serious they looked, and why was it that despite running a half marathon many of the women looked highly glamorous? This was in direct contrast to all of the men who did not come close. 

Amidst all of this, there were rowers racing about on the river. Being the experts that we now are, a lot of time was spent criticising the technique of the sculling and offering handy tips. After another swarm of runners had passed we spotted the ladies crew powering down and we cheered them on as best we could from the wrong side.

Happy in the knowledge that the men would soon be following the spectators admired the ducks, made polite noises to the runners and commented on how frightful it was that there was no champagne on this side of the river. After half an hour we gave up and went into Henley to find coffee and cake, hoping that we had been too late to see the boys rowing. Sadly they had spent so long doing their hair and makeup they didn’t race for another hour, by which time the photographer had gone home.

Henley Town and Visitor’s Regatta – UPDATE

Unlike the rest of the crew Two was paying very close attention to the race and noticed that the crew ahead of us was actually the boat from the previous race which we had caught up with. It was not our opposition after all!

Henley Regatta

Sadly we were not invited to row in the regatta this year. As we are far superior to any other crews around the general feeling of the masters is that it would be unfair on the optimistic youth to enter into the competition, and so we let them get on with it without the added stress of knowing they were all going to lose to a local crew.

We do however feel it is incredibly important to support our local regattas and so we plodded across throughout the week to see what was going on. As far as anyone could tell, there are lots of ladies wearing very nice dresses and hats, gentleman wearing some absurdly striped blazers, no screaming babies and a lot of very nice manners. This is obviously what one would expect of Henley, and we were all happy to report that there has been no parting from tradition this year.

As we were not invited to row we decided to celebrate with a picnic on the Saturday to at least get outside into the open air. Throughout the week we had cheered on a coach of ours (who incidentally was rowing for Leander this year) but sadly he did not win on the Saturday, so we raised a glass to other things instead.

Henley masters do what they always do when they have just cause, champagne was cracked open, huge amounts of food was consumed and most of the afternoon was spent putting the world to rights. Once the picnic transporter left (wearing a black, red and white striped blazer) the left over crew consolidated themselves in the Oyster bar with a bottle of champagne. As usual, Henley regatta was fantastic.

Competition for Henley Women’s Regatta

Thursday evening was a bright and sunny one. The wind had dropped and the sky was clear. Junior crews were all over the landing stages, leaping energetically into boats, enthusiastically charging up and down the river with much shouting. Being a very sedate and sensible crew we let them get out the way before piling into the eight, hoping that they would have got far enough away so that we wouldn’t have to steer around them when we would inevitably catch them up. 

The crew were delighted to be out again, especially as the circulation pattern of the river had changed, giving us a chance to charge up the regatta course without having to be on the wrong side of the river. Seeing Temple Island from the wrong side always feels totally wrong, especially when there aren’t any geese on it. The most serious crews were spinning just beyond the island, joining an enormous queue to pass the start and then practice racing starts and the like. Ignoring all this, we admired a bit of technique from the visiting crews and made our way past the practice area. Past the end of the buoys the river was empty except for the odd goose and a heron.

After a spot of admiring the scenery we shot back to the regatta start hoping to find every other crew had gone and that the coast would be clear for us to charge down the course which we regard to be ours. Sadly though other crews seemed to think that they should also be there and so we had to join the long line of boats to use the start. Having a quick wriggle through the random things that HRR seems to think essential to the running of a regatta we settled into the starting positions and then enthusiastically took off in a manner that any competitor at HRR would have been proud of.

As we were so fast going back up to the finish we caught up with the two crews that had started at least 20 seconds before us. We even had to slow down through the Regatta enclosure due to the slowness of the crews in front.

Cheering ourselves on to the finish we overtook a few stationary crews before the bridge and then pottered back to the club to find another queue waiting for landing stages. The very polite juniors did not jump the queue when they joined it,  and so after at least two minutes of waiting we crossed the river (trying to avoid getting the way of launches and other boats).

The most traumatic event of the outing was when we came back to the landing stages. A small family of ducks (both parents and three tiny ducklings, whom were less than a three days old according to 7) got trapped between the landing stage and the oncoming boat. After a few desperate attempts by the parents to prevent disaster they abandoned their offspring and flew off, leaving three tiny ducklings running on the water in a vain attempt to escape. Cox tried to tell the ducklings the best route to freedom but no notice was taken. Inches from squashed duckling stroke side managed to raise blades in time with bow side holding the boat up hard. After such a trying outing the only thing we could reasonably do was pile into the bar. Sitting out on the balcony with wine and beer was an excellent way to end the outing, discussion then turned to the next row, namely the best one of the year.

Midsummer row at 4am.

Bird Update

Sadly only two cygnets now survive, but they are looking as fluffy and sweet as ever. Is a large pike responsible for disappearance of the other two?

Coots have also decided that landing stages are good places to nest, hopefully they won’t be washed away when the regatta starts! Thanks to 4 for the updates! 

National bird vote result!

The robin has once again been voted as the national bird – results to be found here

CYGNETS ARRIVED!!!

Four fluffy little cygnets first sighted by 5/7 this morning.

Still no cygnets

But the Canadian Geese seem to be having a very good year! (Thanks to 5/7 for the tireless updates.)

Still no cygnets

Mayflies out in force! An interesting species which spend only 24 hours or so as a live adult. There is one species (Dolania americana) which only manages 5 minutes as an adult; obviously being a grown up is very stressful. Huge clouds are currently flying about the river.

No cygnets. Eggs all present and correct, sun still shining on the swan!

Masters master the bar at Henley Rowing Club

The masters of Henley this evening took on Henley Rowing Club bar. This consisted of Cox telling her crew that the last time she sacrificed an evening to bar tending she took a grand total of £13, and so unless the squad put in a very strong appearance then she would abandon the eight and Cox somewhere else. (Despite this apparent threat most people knowing full well that Cox would never abandon them, nor would she even consider the option of finding another crew.)

And so the punters piled in. Within 10 minutes of opening the bar the previous record was smashed and the Cox was becoming well acquainted with the use of a bottle opener. One crew member even requested a gin which required the use of spirit measurer. Despite a steep learning curve the bar tender eventually relaxed into a chair with a glass of something and we quite failed to agree which regatta we would next take on.